When I decided on keeping Shaliah’s hair in its natural state, I never thought about all the negativity that would come with it. All I wanted to do was care for her hair and have it as healthy as possible. I was never ready for all the disgusting looks and rude remarks that comes with it.
Caring for natural hair is difficult in itself without having to deal with all the negativity. So please people stop it!! No wonder there are so many broken and insecure women out there because society is not making it any easier with all the shamming that’s going on.
Below are just few questions and remarks I received on this journey so far:
- “Rozanne wanne doen jy iets omtrent die kind se hare?”
- “Hoekom vleg jy nie die kind se kop nie?”
- “Kyk hoe droog is die kind se kop.”
- “Oooooh sy lyk nogal oulik in dai hair style neh.”
- “Haar hare is nogal lank neh, dit groei darem mooi”
I decided that I would do everything in my power to teach Shaliah to love her hair and to be comfortable in her own skin but most of all to love herself just the way she is. When she’s old enough to understand, I will teach her that people’s opinions doesn’t matter and that she doesn’t have to conform to anyone’s beauty standards. She just need to be herself.
With the natural hair community growing, it has become more acceptable to wear ones hair in its natural state and I’m very thankful for all the natural hair ambassadors out there who are truly embracing their hair and fighting for the movement. These are women my daughter can look up to one day and who will help make this journey easier.
I can only imagine how hard it must have been for all the people who went natural before it was a “thing”. I’m so grateful that my daughter won’t have to go through that.
Shaliah might decide to straighten her hair with chemicals one day and that will be ok with me. The most important thing is that she loves herself and that she won’t conform to anyone’s standards.
So until then I’ll continue educating myself about her hair and nurture it!